Withdrawal, following forced disconnection from the Dark side of the Force.

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Hux hadn’t
known exactly what he was expecting when he went looking for Kylo after he
failed to show up to the bridge on time but it certainly wasn’t this. Kylo was
sitting on the floor of his quarters, his back against the wall and head in his
hands. His breathing was shallow and ragged, so loud that Hux could hear it
from the doorway where he stood. It didn’t seem that Ren knew he was there.

Hux stepped
further into the room and closed the door. Kylo flinched, seeming to realise he
was not alone. He didn’t look up, however, instead preferring to remain in a
curled position.

Hux had a
million questions, so many that he didn’t know which to ask first. His mind
blank he settled on a simple and barked, “Ren?”

Kylo looked
up then, craning his neck back with what seemed to be considerable effort. He
did not look good. His eyes were wild and bloodshot and his was skin mottled
and red, an unhealthy flush high on his cheeks. His jaw was clenched tightly,
his teeth pressed together with such force that Hux could see his jawbone
jutting out clearly from beneath his skin. Kylo’s lips were dark red and wet as
though he had been biting them. It was a struggle for Hux to force his eyes
away from them.

Hux stepped
closer, looming over Kylo. Kylo’s eyes followed him as he moved but they were
glazed and unfocused. As Hux got closer he saw that Kylo was shivering rather
violently, his hand clutched desperately to his chest, his fist so tight his
knuckles had turned white.

“Should you
be in medbay?” Hux asked.

Kylo shot
him what would have probably been a threatening glare under better circumstances.
“No.”

“But you’re—“

“It’s a
test,” Kylo bit out. His voice was strained, words clearly coming to him with
quite some difficulty. “Snoke… The Supreme Leader… cut me away from the Dark
Side. Says I’m unbalanced. He wishes to heighten my attachment to… to the
light. It will make me stronger.”

Hux raised
an eyebrow, “Strength is not what I’m looking at.”

Kylo
scoffed, sneering at Hux as best he could with a jaw clenched so tight Hux
suspected he might break a tooth. “I wouldn’t expect someone like you to
understand.”

A jolt of
rage passed through Hux but before he could retort Kylo groaned, writhing in
pain. Hux winced, watching Kylo begin to claw at his skin, desperately trying
to reach something he never could.

Kylo looked
at him with glossy eyes. “’t burns… it’s calling me…”

Hux, with
concern for Kylo horrifyingly manifesting within him, knelt down in from on Kylo.
Kylo looked at him strangely. He tried to back away but it seemed as though he
was in too much pain to do so, merely jolting away with a quick flinch.

“I should
take you to medbay,” Hux repeated, wracking his mind for something to ease Kylo’s
pain. He knew nothing of the Force but he was sure the powerful sleep-stims the
First Order medbay had available could take away the bite.

Kylo shoot
his head, the motion jerky and unbalanced. “No, no, no, have to ride it out on
my own.”

“Ren…” Hux
reached forward, pressing his hand carefully against Kylo’s knee. Kylo gasped,
breathing in air like he was a man drowning.

Hux went to
pull away, worried that he might have hurt him somehow but Kylo’s hand shot
out, grasping wildly at his own. Hux guided his hand into Kylo’s frantic grasp.
Some of the fog began to clear from Kylo’s eyes. Kylo whined, clutching at Hux’s
arm tightly.  

“There’s so
much darkness in you…” Kylo mumbled, “It’s incredible. I can almost taste it.”

Hux paused,
momentarily at a loss. He hated how much this whole Force thing confused him. “Is
that good?”

Kylo
nodded, his chin bobbling so quickly Hux thought he might hurt himself. “Closer,”
Kylo begged. “Please.”

Kylo tugged
at his arm and Hux let himself be dragged closer and closer to Kylo, settling
in between the Knight’s open knees. Hux swallowed, willing himself to maintain
some sort of composure. He was so close to Kylo he could smell the sweet fragrance
of Kylo’s shampoo – clearly not regulation.

Hux felt
hands bury painfully in his hair and he winced at the tug. Kylo’s grasped at a
fistful of Hux’s hair and tugged his face closer. Hux knew distantly that his
styled hair was now ruined but as he felt the hot gust of Kylo’s breath against
his chin he was finding that fact harder and harder to be angry about.

Kylo looked
at him with pathetically gentle eyes. Hux bit back the urge to scoff. This was
the Light in Kylo Ren. He could put on a mask and hide himself from the world
but below it all Kylo would always have the eyes of a Jedi.

Hux
resisted the urge to flinch away as he felt the press of Kylo’s forehead
against his own. Hux felt a slight pressure start at the front of his mind and
he knew that Kylo was doing something to him with the Force. Hux was too
stunned to scold him. Kylo whimpered, overwhelmed with relief. His breathing
began to slow slightly, going from hyperventilation to something more
manageable. He had also, it seemed, stopped shaking.    

After a
long moment of silence Kylo huffed a laugh. “Who could have guessed I’d find
relief in you.” Kylo groaned, shifting. The pressure in Hux’s mind moved
slightly, jostling as Kylo himself did. “You’re not even Force-sensitive.”  

Hux felt a jilted anger begin to bubble in his
stomach.

“You’re
offended by that,” Kylo stated simply. Hux’s nostils flared. Of course Kylo
would know. He’d probably been rooting around in his memories this whole time,
finding all of his horrible secrets.

“I haven’t,”
Kylo answered without being asked, “Hurts too much.”

“But you’d
do it if you could?”

Kylo
hummed, his voice shaky but clearer now. It seemed as though whatever Hux was
doing was helping. “Only if you let me.”

“I didn’t
think the Force needed permission,” Hux said.

“It doesn’t.”

It was then
that Hux caught on. It wasn’t that Kylo couldn’t read his thoughts without
permission, it was simply that he didn’t want to. Hux wondered distantly what
he’d done to warrant such specific care from careless Kylo Ren. He let the
question hang, but Kylo didn’t answer. It didn’t seem as though Kylo could
answer that himself.

Perhaps
Kylo cared.

(How preposterous.)